


For The Memories

by moonofmorrigan



Series: EvenStar: Daily Writing Challenge Fics [4]
Category: The Lord of the Rings (Movies), The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types, The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Angst, Challenge fic, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-05
Updated: 2018-02-05
Packaged: 2019-03-13 22:23:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13580178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonofmorrigan/pseuds/moonofmorrigan
Summary: Haldir escorts Arwen back to Rivendell one last time.For sdavid09 on Tumblr's Daily Writing Challenge. Prompt - Angst.





	For The Memories

**Author's Note:**

> This story is a work of fanfiction, and is not endorsed by the originator(s) of the work. All official characters and settings are the property of their respective owners. No copyright infringement, offense, or solicitation is intended. This story has been written for entertainment value only. No profit is being made from this writing. 
> 
> For @sdavid09's Daily Writing Challenge
> 
> PROMPT #3 - Angst
> 
> No warnings other than... heavy angst.

HALDIR had dreaded this journey for months. He glanced ahead at the white horse carrying the graceful hooded figure. They would reach Rivendell in but a few hours. The journey had grown more dangerous and the safest paths were beginning to swarm with foul creatures. Yet all the peril was nothing compared to the heaviness that lay on his heart.

 

For a century Arwen had stayed in Lorien under the guidance of her grandmother. However, she returned to her father, and it was Haldir's instinctive impression he would never see her again. He had no explanation for it other than intuition. Something would hold her there, and with it, so would his heart.

 

They passed under the falling leaves in quiet. His guard were ever watchful of their charge. The Lady Galadriel did not wish to accompany them this time. If she and Lord Celeborn had, he may have been able to divert his attention. Yet there was no distraction from it, and he had to face it head on like every brave warrior must.

 

Finally, when the sun began to hang low over the trees and mountains the glittering beauty of Imladris came into view. He sighed as the group stopped to admire it before making their way to the bridge. The dread mounted and he had to shut the normally wonderful sight from his view.

 

"Are you well Haldir?" he heard the lady say, and the clatter of hooves come to him.

 

He nodded and planted a false smile on his face. "As ever my lady. Shall we press on?"

 

She smiled at him, he dared to say there was a polite affection there in it. But no, not admiration. As he waved the party forward and they finally made their way across the bridge, passing the waterfalls into the arches that led into steps, he knew he was walking slower by the moment. He had relaxed his monitoring of the forest and roads nearby as soon as they reached the bridge as he knew the rest of his guards did as well. He stood back as Elrond and a small group of elves from the higher classes came out to welcome his daughter. He greeted the party with the proper elvish gesture, which they returned - hand to the heart and outstretched to offer good will and greetings. Elrond, of course, was embraced his daughter after the proper pleasantries were done. Then turned to Haldir and his brothers with a sincere thanks for her safe passage. Knowing his party needed to rest for a few days and restock their supplies for the road back, he accepted the offer of lodgings. No matter if he wanted to turn back immediately.

 

Weary and heavy hearted he retired to his guest quarters. He noted the humble surroundings compared to what he knew Arwen and her father enjoyed and reminded himself again of the reason he could never even ask to court her. She was a lady - noble blooded and above all else a ruler's daughter. He, though highly promoted and trustworthy was nothing more than a common wood elf. He felt no shame in this. But loving a lady forced the idea of it to leave a bad taste in his mouth.

 

He fell into a fitful sleep, and awakened with the dawn. He decided to take a walk in the gardens. Something rarely afforded to an elf from Lorien. When he reached it however he nearly turned back. Arwen came quickly to him, a broad smile on her face, and raising a hand in greeting. Planting the same fake smile on his face from the day before, he bowed slightly in greeting when she stood before him.

 

"Haldir! I am happy to see you are taking a tour of our gardens. Tell me, what is your first impression?" She looped her arm in his which gave him pause and a flush to come to his cheeks before he looked about him.

 

He noted the fountains and many colorful flowers. The trees growing in strategic spots to enhance their beauty, and those of the flowers. Yes, it was beautiful but not something he could grow accustomed to. It reminded him again of the difference in their positions. "It is very beautiful, but..." he trailed off and decided to not continue his critique as they began to walk.

 

She smiled up at him and in a knowing voice said, "It is not the forest."

 

He stopped, shocked and bowed. Flustered he and worried he caused offense he tried to mumble out an apology. She hushed him with a single finger on his lips. Then for that moment - this one sweet moment Haldir forgot he was just a Marchwarden and she a lady. That she was not to be wooed by the likes of him, and lost in it reached up and cupped her cheek tenderly and leaned down. He almost tasted her lips for one divine moment before it all flooded back to him, and he straightened. He noted a confused, disappointed look in her eyes. He looked away unable to bear that gaze.

 

Then he felt her hand on his cheek, turning his face to look at her. Unable to resist he let her, and seen her shaking her head.

 

"I have known for many years of your feelings Haldir. Just as I know your reservations. I believe you also know I will never return to Lorien again... not until our people have left these shores. I have seen that much. I would be lost in you had I not seen my fate in my grandmother's mirror, and if not for that I would abandon all, and have encouraged you to take my hand."

 

So his feeling was right? Why did he ever doubt it? He let a sad smile come to his face, "I understand, though I am not sure if it will make it easier to bear."

 

She looked away and back at him, the same smile on her face. "Allow yourself one moment, and kiss me. Then let me go."

 

"For the memories?" he said a mocking laugh in his voice.

 

"To ease the pain of not knowing..., so yes, in a way, for the memories," she replied wiping the mocking smile from his face.

 

Yes, she knew him. She knew him too damned well! With it she wrapped her hand around the back of his neck and he let her pull him down to meet her lips. It seemed everything went still for those few seconds and all he knew was the taste of honey and berries on his tongue, the sweet softness of her lips, hair as his arms encircled her waist, the feeling of her body pressed against his. Then but a few moments later it was gone. She pulled away, grasped his hand in hers and looked deeply in his eyes.

"Be well dearest Marchwarden. I hope you find peace and love."

 

He clung to her hand for one heart wrenching moment longer and let go. He forced a large lump in his throat down, "My best wishes to you as well my lady. Farewell."

 

Her lips parted as if to speak but then closed and with a slight bow she turned around and began to stroll further down the path. Haldir watched silently, his breath suddenly hard to find. A couple moments later he seen another person coming on to the path - a young human man. He watched as the man caught sight of Arwen and he look of recognition on her face and a slight alarm that past quickly. It was then that he knew what was about to pass, and with it he turned back with a shattering exhale and inhale to the house never to look back and never to see his lady again.

  
FINISH


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